"Meet the new boss --- same as the old boss" : does that also apply to your buddy Jesse the Bod?

Does anyone know if Nader's running in 04'? Can any of the Beavers think of a legitimate reason why he would not make a good President? And how hard could being President of the most powerful Nation be?

I remember getting busted with pot and getting fired from Burger King when I was seventeen. After cleaning out (and mopping the basement) I remember my Mom telling me (paraphrasing of course - I was pretty doped up at the time), "You do realize that you'll never be able to become President now, don't you?"

I learned my lesson. I've very rarely smoked pot since. But I've learned another lesson since: I can still become President. I've got a t-shirt with Uncle Sam on the front with his finger pointed forward saying: "Even you can become President."

I'm not running for President in 04', so why not Nader - second best thing.

In the mean time I plan on trying out to make the NY Mets. Wish me luch Beavers. If I don't make it back, rest assured I am in a happy place.

I remember Bob Costas once saying that fans don't identify with their favorite team's players anymore, but with the anouncers who call thier favorite team. First point to make: Bob Costen is a Cardinals fan, and I'm glad he doesn't anounce for them. Second: Joe Buck needs to follow in Chip Carey's footsteps and anounce for the team that paid for his school lunches while growing up. Why is Joe Buck whoring himself out to ESPN, or whatever game of the week network he's working for now. Thirdly: Al Hrobosky looks at home drenched in Budweiser. Al should take Mike Shannon's lead and start getting loaded during broadcasts.

Andy Warhol would be proud

Here today
Gone Tomorrow

I am going to DC Thursday to march on Washingtion for nonviolence and fair trade. If I don't come back, know that I loved my country.

Is the US ready for its first Japanese President - Will the Cardinals win the 2002 World Series? The answer to both of these questions will be answered in a very special episode of Futurama. Or you can take heart in the lyrics of a not-so-obscure band from England: "Smoke Pot, Smoke Pot, Everybody Smoke Pot."

"that's a winner." I got into baseball listening to Jack Buck. If it weren't for Buck, I don't think I would give 3 shits if the Cardinals won the division or finished tied for last with Millwaukee Brewers.

What I remembered and liked about Jack Buck: Jack called it like he saw it, when the Cardinals stunk, he said so. When the Cardinals were great, Jack made them even better.

When the Cardinals won the division tonight, all I could think about was how much I missed Jack Buck and how he would have made the call on Rolen's somesault catch to cinch the title.

Nuff said, bring on the dasterdly Snakes - down with Arizona. (And) forget about the twins - contract the white sox. that towns only big enough for one group of stupid fans.

What the world needs now is less actors turned politians and more wrestlers turned politicians. What's Mr. Fuji up to these days?

Cardinals clinched their division tonight, 40 1/2 games in front of their arch rivals the Chicago Cubs. Maybe next year for the hapless Cubies.

Will the Cardinals make it pass the Arizona Shilling-Johnson Backs. Probably not, but anything is possible in baseball. Hell, the Cubs won the World Series - even if it was 167 years before I was born.

How bout them south-siders? It turns out that of the 187 White Sox fans in attendence, two of them hated the the Royals first base coach. Mathematical equation: 7% of all White Sox fans in attendence are violent bare-chested catshits who got grief with aging first base coaches. I still think that White Sox fans got more class then any other Chicago Team Baseball fan.

Has anyone seen my Dodger hat?

Today I sneezed with a mouthful of food. I did not want snot to fly across the new vinyl floor so I opened my mouth and blew noodles across the kitchen instead.
I ask you, did I do the right thing?

I sometimes spit when I talk.

I have a great idea. Let's move out to California and become schlepy Hollywood actors, who wrestle to make a living, one day aspiring to become Governor of an unsuspecting state.
What an awesome idea. It cannot fail, and we would be destined to be labeled genius', commanding the agreement of all who listen to us on Nightline.

Wow. What a coincidence, I just gone done watching the new Woody Allen movie and then I get on the blog and that's what the beavers are talking about. We think alike.

Personally, I don't judge Woody on whether or not he was a good step-father, but its hard to get past his sexual past when he jokes about it in all of his movies. There's always a little bit of sickness from Woody's personel life that he incorporates work. Lately, however, his films have not focused quite as much on his affinity for little girls.

What is it about Woody that you don't like anymore Joe? Is it stricly his personel behavior with his family, or is it how he seems to trivialize and poke fun of his past sexual indiscretions through his movies. Personally I don't give a crap. I don't think he's a genius, but I never miss any of his movies. Sure he's a pervert. OK he's more then a pervert, he's a complete sodomizer.

Movie Stars and celebreties I've been compared to: Sean Penn, Jeff Foxworthy, and lately James Woods. I Don't know who James Woods is.

You see, the problem is I have no sense of humor. I don't understand subtlety or irony. This whole Wily Beaver thing we are doing?
NOT FUNNY

I also think that Joe reminds Monica of Woody Allen. I never compare people, I think it is rude and insulting. Even your less than average Springfield citizen has more character than most Hollywood air-heads.

Did you know that Paul is a real estate novelist who never had time for a wife? It's true.

Time for another Internet blog poll.

How hateful is Matthew Komanecky?

• He is not hateful, he only comes across that way.
• He is not full of hate, because there is the tiniest bit of live somewhere in his heart.
• Is there anything he does not hate?
• He is so hateful it is evil. He should be destroyed.

I have been sitting here wondering.... Joe am I the only one that thinks you remind me of Woody Allen?

Apathy bombs. That's what we are gonna drop. America's "Who gives a shit how many Iraqi's die" attitude is gonna be inside each and every one of those precision computer-guided daisy cutters that the U.S. Air Force is gonna be droppin' in the desert this fall.
Apathy bombs. We will destroy you by not giving a fuck.

Death and destruction! Death and destruction!

There is a heavy metal band from Downers Grove, Illinois called Novembers Doom. Saddam should really listen to these guys, cause he has his own surprise coming in November. Here are some lyrics to a song called, Not the Strong:

How many times have I fallen before you
How much longer can I go on
To raise to my feet, to try this game again
I often point fingers of blame

If only my mother knew the real me
Her heart would break, for I am shame
Not the strong man she raised from birth
A coward, a child, and a scared soul

I really think Saddam would break down and cry if he would just give these guys a listen. Powerful stuff.

Sing us a song, you're the piano man
Sing us a song tonight
Well, we're all in the mood for a
melody
And you've got the feelin' all right.

Now John at the bar is a friend of mine
He gets me my drinks for free
And he's quick with a joke, or a light
up your smoke
But there's someplace he'd rather be.

He says, "Bill, I believe this is killling
me."
As the smile runs away from his face
"Well I'm sure that I could be a movie
star,
If I could get outta this place."

Oh, la la la, de de da
La la, de de de, da da

Mr. Komanecky: I've read about your problems with ads on the Beaver, and I would like to make a helpful suggestion: Victoria Secrets. Look up "playful and naughty panties" on their website. I think that Mrs V's ads would dutifully respect the content the Beaver's character. Look into those panty ads. I personally have them plastered all over my desktop.

In respsonse to my prior post, I would like to make a more accurate comparison: that of snails to slugs with a texas lisp / (drawl?) Shame on you Mr Natale.

Comparing G-Dub to Bud Selig is like comparing oranges to tangerines. Shame on you Mr. Natale for coming up with such a gross and shameless comparsision.

I worked 40 hours in the last 3 days and I'm listening to Billy Joel's "We didn't start the fire."

Who says Americans are lazy slobs? There's a general misconception that Germans are the hardest working people in the world. Wrong. They're up there with the Italians. Only in Europe do people take 3-month vacations. Only in Europe do people take 3-hour lunch breaks. There's a lot of talk lately about patriotism. I've got my own take on patriotism, and its not how our military is superior (even thought it is.). In the terrible days following of 9-11, the firefighters of New York city worked endless 15 / 16 hour days to save the lives of people trapped, and then later, to dig up the remains of the dead

They did all this knowing that most of the dead were not people who worked in the building, but people that they lived and died with - other firefighters. I think its sad to think about digging through endless wreckage to find the remains of your peers.

I can't help but to think about how those firefighters felt during those subsequent days thereafter, especially the days (possibly day) when they knew all that they would find would be the dead remains, at the same time knowing the it might as just as well have been them lying in the rubble.

That brings me to war. Firefighters are not soldiers. They are not prepared to deal with a situation on a scale that terrible - soldiers are. The soldiers are lucky (or a least "luckier.")

When I was I kid, I - like a lot of other kids - wanted to be a fireman. I also wanted to star in the next round of Star Wars movies, too late for that - damn you McGregor.

My point is, would Ewen McGregor make a good fireman?

Yes. Damn right he would.

And even though I think I could play a better obi-won, I don'[t think I could deal with the what the New York firefighters had to after 9-11. That is patriotism to me. That's how I feel about America. And on that note, Goodnight Saigon, and - Good Morning Iraq. Boo-Yah!

Apparently it's not cool to have a favorite Billy Joel song, and it's even less cool when your favortie Joel song is "Tell her about it." But I've always loved it, and always will. It speaks volumes to me. Kevin's favortite Billy Joel song is Goodnight Saigon. Cooler then "Tell Her About It," but still a pretty uncool war song.

there's an article in the villiage voice right now, and it talks about one of my old favorite artists: billy joel. part of the article focuses on billy's legace, and how 50 years from now no one will look at joel in the same light that as other great artists from 70's and 80's. The article talks about johhny rotten and neil young, and then it quotes how critics have always said billy joel never really mattered - and will never be considered "cool." There's a phrase in Spanish, and I don't know how to spell it, but I will try: Juevos! It means "Balls" - as in testes. What a crock! Johnny Rotten never banged a supermodel, and Neil Springsteen - whatever his name is - writes more sentimental slop then any "respected artist" of the last couple of milleniums. Juevos! Joel has always been dissed by the critics. I myself am supercritical of everthing. I think most everything sucks juevos, but I love billy joel. I "admire" guys like Nel Young and Johnny Rotten, I listen to, and identify with Billy Joel. Post and Publish. That's the last I will ever write about billy joel.

Smiles are contagious! :-D
Humility is like venereal disease. If you have it, you don't talk about it.
Inspiration is like a venereal disease; the only people who don't have one are ugly.
Car crashes are like sexual intercourse. I don't know how exactly, but they are. I think it has something to do with sex, death, orgasms, and God.

Bill Clinton is still doing great work since he left office, like going on talk shows and working to Harlem. Miss him not Joe, for he is still with us.