Thursday, August 07, 2003

Wednesday, August 06, 2003

We've been spending a lot of time together. I needed a break.

I'll be early tonight for a change, Moni.

It's Eric Fliege's Birthday today.

Happy Birthday Eric!
why didn't you and bianca talk on tuesday?
Inquiring minds want to know
Mattie---deal... two brothers it is at 9:45. Don't be late. PLEASE --i hate sitting alone. All you other beavers are welcome to join us... thursday 9:45 at Two Brothers.
Not responding to your taunts makes me superior.

Monica, Thursday is great. Let's go to Two Brothers at 9:30 or 10.
Matt K, I really need to know what makes you think you are superior over me.

Yea, that monkey thing pissed me off. I await your imminent crash and burn. On the outside I will show pity, but on the inside I will cry with bliss. That's right, bliss at your suffering. HA HA HA HA HA
Bianca and Matt's Tuesday itinerary: Don't talk to each other.
You gave me an idea for an alliteration: From your perspective, poetry is a place of permanent pubescence.

Thanks Gasbag!

Tuesday, August 05, 2003

Mattie----
Sorry bout monday night... i was at work. Maybe thursday night?
2 and a half weeks til new apartment. I will be inviting friends over for a meal.!!!!! I will be cooking.
Brian----Thanks for forgiving me. I was worried all weekend.
Off to replant an aloe vera plant.... How exciting!!!!!!
Yes Matt K, this 'monkey boy' as you qualified me, was dead on the nose on your pubescent ramblings. Why do you continue to degrade yourself in this way? Keep perspective.

Matt B, all I can say is...why?
Matt. Your poem makes me constipated. Good work chap!

Monday, August 04, 2003

I agree with your Koan gasbag.

Meanwhile: My world. I'm making collared greens today. Usually white people don't do shit like that. But sometimes it's important for white guys to put away their skateboards, turn down their heavy metal music, and learn about other cultures. ie; black people. Does anyone have any suggestions as to some spices I should put in my greens.
Bianca and Matt's weekend itinerary:

Friday: had a drink in the pink room at the 11 west martini bar, and discussed our superiority and higher class than the other erudites. Went to Floyd's and got a "thumbs up" from a mullet headed stanger in approval of my date for the evening. Talked to Andy Powell and Megan Burpo. They are getting married finally, after five years of dating.

Saturday: Woke up together, very sweetly. Saw her off to work around 7 am.
Watched some anime later that night: Barefoot Gen and Royal Space Force.

Sunday: Sandwiches and a walk in Washington park, around the carillon.
After Bianca fell asleep in my arms around 8, I made coffee and watched Casablanca for the first time. It thundered and lighteninged on the drive home.

We have some great conversations too.
You don't have to read what is posted, monkey boy. Didn't your momma teach you about free will and choice?
Also, brush up on the art of skimming long passages. Very useful if you ever have to read a collection of Gore Vidal's ramblings that you borrowed from your friend's stepdad.
This is evolution:
The monkey
The Man
then
the gun
Monica, of course I forgive you. How could I not?
Matt, I despise your rambling cut and paste messages. Do you think any of us actually read that crap? Short, consise, and to the point is all I ask for. Please just make a statement; not a textbook.

I apologize but it had to be said.

The only Koan I have come up with recently is that I exist only to exist. Comments?
Dada
Pronunciation: dah-dah
Function: noun
Etymology: French
Date: 1919
: a movement in art and literature based on deliberate irrationality and negation of traditional artistic values; also : the art and literature produced by this movement
I mistyped Bianca. She is a healthy Four, which operates like a One. The critical and analytical Virgo that she is threw me off too.
The emphases below are mine. Take all this with a grain of salt -- Personality types in my experience expose only a fraction of who the individual really is.

Enneagram Type Four (the Individualist)
with
Enneagram Type Four (the Individualist)


What Each Type Brings to the Relationship
As with all double-type relationships, two Fours generally bring the same qualities to each other. Thus, the Level of health of each person is especially important for these types of relationships as are their dominant instincts. Double Four pairs generally make good friends and deep friendship is something they often bring to their intimate relationships. Fours often feel misunderstood, yet feel a special bond of understanding with other Fours. They share stories of their childhood traumas, their private dreams and disappointments. Both types are openly emotional and sensitive to the needs of the other. Both are looking for adequate mirroring and in a double Four relationship, they have a real possibility of finding it.

Because each person in a double Four couple is so attuned to their own emotions, there is a great deal of sensitivity and respect for individuality and each other's emotional needs. They have the ability to laugh at themselves and to find amusement with each other in the dark loneliness of the childhood and adolescence. They are not put off by unearthing deep psychological and personal issues. Both are encouraging of the artistic and creative efforts of the other and find it easy to communicate about the most private and intimate issues as they arise. They feel that their relationship is a truly safe space where the other is on a similar emotional wavelength: both feel less alone and less like something is wrong with them personally. Double Fours are highly romantic and idealistic as a couple and their intimacy has the potential to grow into a grand passion of virtually operatic proportions. Emotional ups and downs, hopes and disappointments, elation and despair tend to make this couple more focused on itself than on practical life, child raising, or their careers. Enormous candor, deep friendship, and consideration for the unique history and emotional needs of the other would be hallmarks of this relationship.

Potential Trouble Spots or Issues
Emotional instability of the relationship itself is the main potential problem with a double Four intimate couple. Each person can be self-absorbed and excruciatingly aware of what he or she is getting (and not getting) in the relationship. Both want to be the focus of attention regarding emotional issues. Both want special handling—and insist on having special needs and they can resent the other for demanding the same for themselves. Both long for an ideal mate—and the feeling that one has found it—can alternate with depression (and other reactions) when expectations are disappointed. They can get into "Who's more damaged?" contests, a form of negative competition. Both are more or less secretly looking for a rescuer and can get lost in a morass of emotional drama even if they find one.
For all of their potential sensitivity, Fours also tend to withdraw from others and to withhold their attention and affection when they are having a conflict with someone. Fours have a profound lack of trust in others, and this lack of trust can extend even to their intimate partner. A period of testing will invariably happen that may be too much for the other Four to bear. They can be annoyed by the other's quirks and "sensitivities" and unacknowledged demands. They can be intolerant of the other, making each other walk on eggshells, ironically making it difficult to bring up certain issues with the other.

Double Fours can become moody and incommunicative, passive-aggressive, and disdainful, actually hating the very person they may have been so passionately in love with. Rejecting the other (and feeling rejected) can alternate from both parties. Arguments can spiral out of control and hurtful things get said until reconciliation becomes difficult, if not impossible. Once certain things are said in the heat of the moment, they can never be taken back. Permanent damage is done to feelings of trust and safety—and to the future of the relationship. Once hope for the relationship dies, it is difficult to resuscitate.
Yes, new bloggers coming soon.
She must be writing poetry about me in her paper journals. Yeah, that's it.

Sunday, August 03, 2003

Geez..... have you forgiven me YET?
Brian, please accept my humble apology, for I am truly sorry. I should have in fact accused Fiebakki Misakki aka mattb. of being a butthole. I can't ever keep the beavers straight for nobody uses their real names. Aliases are fun but I can't keep track.

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