On my tombstone I want it to read: "I'm not getting any older."

Sorry Moni. I didn't mean that. I just wanted to see how it looked written out.
Reading the Potter book. Apparently H.P. is going thru Puberty. Title should be "Harry Testicles."

No. You're right gasbag. These kids aren't causing anyone grief yet. They'll do that later when they let them out of that hole. They'll run around using religion to annoy the rest of the general population.

Personally, I'm a pretty gung-ho Jesus guy, but I find these type of people to be pretty freaking irritating. I don't hate 'em, but I don't like 'em either. Don't worry about inciting any anger this way. My language might be little extreme - that's just how I type.


Also, I find the Amish to be a very interesting group of people. The menonites? I'll jerk off in their faces, they can go straight to hell.

Sorry I didn't respond to your post Monica, but my fingers were broken. Who's the asshole now?

Monica, but what can I do? I'm only one person.

so now my posts are ignored? Nobody responds to monica's posts anymore?
( i don't expect a reply to that by the way)

Uhg, I posted that to share the amusement I felt from reading it, not to incite hatered toward anyone. I guess you hate the Amish too? Menonites? Monks of any religion? They all live by strict rules. At least these kids can have zippers.

My point is if someone wants to live there life by certain rules, as long as it's not causing outsiders grief, let them be. I only wish that I could be a little more disiplined at times.

Hey, I'm into facism as much as the next guy, but these guys are over the top. This is got nothing to do with religion. My beef with them is they fancy themselves more disciplined then the general population, and that's bullshit. Their problem is they don't want to grow up. They want strict rules to keep them in line. That to me says they don't believe they can be disciplined without the threat of being kicked out of their prestigious club. These kids have less freedom then most 12-year-olds. As far as I can see that makes these college-aged students nothing more then babies. My advice to these assholes: Grow Up. Live in the real world. What I really hate is that the school uses Christianity to disguise what is essentially a fascist environment.

Jesus Christ did not live like these kids.

Yes Mike, you can, but they would most likely just forgive you for it.

Who ends up looking like the asshole in that scenario?

If the life they've chosen is to be a bunch of fucking assholes, then I got every right to call them a bunch of fucking assholes.

3. Women students may not wear slacks or shorts on
campus, off campus in public, or in the presence of
other students.

Here, you search through their handbook for it. http://www.gagelabs.com/newvoice/resources/pcchandbook2001.txt

Don't get angry at them. It's the life they've chosen.

While were on the subject of fetishes: I've notice lately I cannot get aroused unless a girl is fully-dressed. How cool is that?

That's great. What a bunch of fucking assholes. Who wears pants to the beach? I'll tell you who: IDIOTS.

They probably aren't even allowed to play with themselves either. Hey Gasbag, see if they can play with their peckers at that place. I didn't notice anywhere in the dress code about wearing semen-stained pants either.

no.

We do not feel that "clothes make the person."
You will find that our emphasis at Pensacola Christian
College is on the inward quantities of character.
With this in mind, you will not need a large,
expensive wardrobe.

1. Men--Hair should be cut in such a way that it
does not come over the ears, eyebrows, or collar.
Sideburns should be no longer than the middle of the
ear. Styles related to counterculture, such as hair
style or color, clothing, and jewelry, are not
acceptable. Men must be clean shaven--no beards or
mustaches are permitted. Belts should be worn with
pants which have belt loops. Socks should always be
worn.

Attire/Occasion
Formal or Semiformal: Tuxedo or dress suit with shirt
and tie/Banquets, Fine Arts Series

Sunday Dress: Coat with matching or complementary
slacks, dress shirt and tie, dress shoes/Church
services, evening meals, Sunday meals, recitals,
Vespers, forums, and seminars

Morning Dress: *Dress slacks, dress shirt, tie, dress
shoes/Morning classes, chapel, and breakfast

Afternoon Dress; Neat, collared shirt (no tie
necessary) and *dress slacks/Afternoon classes, off
campus, Saturday meals, Friday evening meal, sports
events

Casual Dress: Jeans (no stone-washed denim),
sweatsuits, sweatshirts, T-shirts, tennis shoes/Work,
recreation, designated areas. Corduroy jeans and
jean-style pants made of any fabric are considered
jeans. Men should wear long pants and shirts to and
from the beach. Tennis shoes may not be worn off
campus except when going to the beach. Jean jackets
or stone-washed denim may not be worn.

Sports Center: Casual pants (Dockers, Bugle Boy, etc.)
, nylon jogging suits. We ask that no caps,
Levi's/jeans, denim, sweatpants, sweatshirts, or
spandex be worn. Collared shirts (no writing or
pictures) should be worn. PCC T-shirts and
sweatshirts are appropriate.

Physical Education Classes: Pensacola Christian
College gym trunks and T-shirts (purchased on campus)
and white gym shoes and socks.

*no pegged or patch-pocket pants.

I have a question regarding a specific CD, is Gwar ok to listen to, Mr. Residence Manager? My pastor Reverend Stang likes their song, MARTYR DUMB. Is that wrong?

"Yes, they ARE like the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on ACid -- REAL GOOD acid, a LOT of it. Like the POWER RANGERS but X-rated and TOTALLY SATANIC. Like a Robert Williams painting brought to life. Plus they have a great looking eveil nekkid girl dancer who breaths fire, and 19 foot tall robot monsters on stage, and in the first 5 minutes of their Ragnarok end of the world tour, they decapitate OJ Simpson and disembowel the resurrected corpse of Jerry Garcia. Plus the lead singer gets abducted by aliens and the nekkid dancer babe gets an abortion while crucified of her mutant baby, which baby then bites off the face of the SUBGENIUS of the band, the sadistic sophisticate Arabian Nights S&M genii called The Sexicutioner... "

1. Music Standards--At Pensacola Christian College,
we feel it important that our students learn to
appreciate and be involved in music that enhances
their Christian testimony. Therefore, students are
encouraged to listen to classical, semiclassical and
good Christian music. The fine arts staff of the
College acknowledges its responsibility to provide
musical experiences designed to develop the appetites
of our students for such music.
The following types of music are not permitted:
a. Current popular music
b. Jazz, rock, rap, folk, "Nashville" type, or new age
music
c. Religious music performed in the folk, western
rock, or gospel rock style
d. Soundtracks from movies rated PG-13, PG, or below

Because the easy-listening music on local radio
stations is consistently rock music, the only station
we recommend in Pensacola is 89.5 Rejoice Radio.

2. Music Checks--It is the students' responsibility
to be certain they listen to music that meets the
college standard. Music that does not meet the
standard must be turned in immediately. Students who
have questions regarding specific tapes, records, or
CDs should turn them in to the residence manager to be
checked. Approved music will be returned to the
music. Unsuitable music will be retained by the
College until the semester concludes. Headphones and
earphones should not be brought to the campus.

As a non-Potterphile, I'll wait to borrow book five, rather than pay for it.
When you were at the White House, did you remember to bow and curtsy?

I've started my Master's Project. Jesus H. Buddha Muhammad Krishna, What a monster. I'll be busy with this until 2004.

I hurt myself reading a book this weekend. I feel betrayed, angry, and dissappointed with my body.

Boys are not hard to lure. According to research, they like and respond to, in no particular order: cleavage, breasts, comic books, video games, guns, fake boobs, tight asses, The Matrix, Star Trek, sports, dating advice from women, dick or pussy jokes, their mommies.

I talked to Grandpa Joe today about the NL Central. He predicted a dismal third for the Redbirds. My prediction for NL Central: Cubs finish first. During their celebration Dusty Baker seals the final step of the Cubs Suicide Pact by lacing their Old Styes with poison during the club house celebration.

The ex-Cub factor that has been plaguing Major Legue Baseball for years is finally broken. (Mark Grace bats .400 in 2004)

I wouldn't mind being a fucking rabbit - or a celibant squirrel.

and finally,,,,,,, i went to washington d.c. this weekend and for the first time in my life saw the white house........... am i the last one of the beavers to see it?

harry Potter book 5............. rise of the phoenix...... who has started reading it?

Matt, How do I lure lots of young boys to Boy of the Week.com?
It's important to get this up and running.

I have no problem being reincarnated as one of the many types of rodent species, such as the beaver or otter. I don't want to be a bug--that is my human bias--but life would at least be comparitively short. Exotic creatures come to mind when I think of having a choice in inhabiting a new life form, especially sea creatures: squid, plankton, crab, jellyfish, stingray.

Oh, to be a plankton. Life's duties would be simpler. My life's goal would be to be eaten by a blue whale.

I could do forrest creatures too. Brown bear or elk. The nobility of the woodland.

Bow before me you fucking rabbits and squirrels.

There is a scene in Citizen Kane where they are at the printing press deciding which headline to run for the next day after the election in which Kane appears to have lost by a landslide because of the scandal with the singer. Instead of "Kane Elected!" they are forced to run "Fraud At The Polls!"

There is a sci-fi movie that does a homage of this scene after an alien invasion. The printing press operators are trying to decide which headline to run: "World Ends!" or "World Saved!"

Jesus Christ, it is hard to find a good cult. But I have found a parady of one -- Church of the Subgenius.

One of the jokes revolves around X-Day, which was June 6th, 1998, when spaceships filled with sex goddesses comes to Earth and take away the subgenii, then destroy the world.

One of the purposes of the X-day myth is to scare all other cults into killing themselves. So far so good. Like the weak-minded followers they are, many have succeeded, such as those Heaven's Gate folks. Other notable Mass suicides in recent years.

If we can just scare those sex-crazed Raelians...our only real rival. They have more than their fair shair of hot, sex addicted women.
And Matt might be offended by this Raelian endeavor, "'Babytron' Artificial Womb Is the Next Raelian Project"

On my tombstone, I want it to say:

"I could not find a good suicide cult
and I grew old"

On my tombstone I want it to say:

"America's Funnyman"

On my tombstone, I want it to say:

"With the short time I had
I tried to be funny"

What is this "red headed pussy demon named Kimberly?"

I bought twelve condoms expecting to have protected sex with 12 different wholesome camping girls. Two of them had red hair. Pussy demon was conspicously absent. I did however get some good pictures of me blowing condoms up with my nose tonight. Scottie also took some pictures of me wearing my old manager's brazziere.