Hang in there Chubby!!

We are the future of the world. Me and my friends. We are the hope of humanity; the promise of God.

That's all in the divine plan, right?

It feels good to vent and whine and cry. That's what blogs are for.

I get it. Whiskey wants to go out and have fun. Yeah, that's great. So do we all. I just want her to show me that she is willing to drop everything to come home to me. Am I being unreasonable? She says I'm being controlling, and she's rebelling against me. It really hurts.

I had to take a day off work today. I never do that. I'm Mr. Dependable. I don't get sick. I can always be counted on. Well, not anymore.

I'm having a real hard time here. We've been together 14 months. This is definitely my longest, most serious relationship. And she's testing me. Just like I'm testing her. Who will win? Why is it a contest? I just don't understand.

Why can't she put down the drink to come home to me? Cause she needs to decompress? Blow off a little steam? Girls will be girls. You should see her when she's drinking. She's a different person. Alcohol is the devil. I'm pathetic. It's so stupid. Why do we have to be stubborn about this?

I can't seem to work my way through this. I'm just not mature enough. Neither is she.

Relationships are hard. She says to me: I'm 24, and I can do whatever I want.

Ughh.

Right, you can rip my heart out and eat it too, 'cause your 24.

This blog was supposed to be my live journal. Well, here is a taste of what I thing about. Enjoy. My mind is pretty repetitive, and so boring. I suppose all of our minds are. We just repeat the same brainwave patterns, over and over and over again. Relive the same injuries; Fantasize about the same old agonies. Boo. Boorring.

fuck tic tac. anyway that's what i figured happened. you gotta stop watching wilco bro. we gotta see some electronic act before the end of the year.

i couldn't find anybody else to go so i won't be out that way. maybe i'll stop by on my way back wednesday.

You wanna go see rjd2 tic tac? I'm driving to chi town that on the ninth to drop a friend off at the airport and I'm not sure if I can take the 12th and 13th off too, but I will try if you still wanna go see that show.

Is anybody else interested in going?

score 1786 for the skinny mann

http://www.dropkickthefaint.com/

My high score is 1689.

Press the space bar to start running, and again to dropkick.

I hate it when Whiskey gets passive aggresive. Say what you mean, will ya?

they're thinking about moving the Cardinals to Chicago. That sounds like fun.

hOLY Crist. Did ju see the 1 wher Trent is pumping his arM? That dude got BIG! Even his head is more muscular. Now he priobably has more energy to complain. As you can see, im tired of spellchecking.

Hi Child Acotr! No I didn't call you... Oh wait, yes I did by accident. I let it ring once and then hung up. Whas up? How's the new life in chanmgapoing? Is school everything you'd hopped itd be? Do you know how much I hat e spellcheking? alot.

this is very liberating not using puncturation too along with not using splel checker.

opps, is used a period and a camma. dammit i didit aagain um

what aelses? I have a neice office on the 4th floor ob Brookens library I can look down and juadge pleplep all day.

QWill you tell Gayle she needs to call me? she sends me an email on if I've had time to work on the brundage scholarship and she doesnt even take the time to include a message in the subject line. how rude. I get a message about blank. Take the time lady to write in the subject line! GOD! her office is off green street above the bookstore. Pls tell her she is lazy too. and I quit.

"Cappa split from the Wu a while back over financial stuff, and he's spent the past couple of years driving an unlicensed cab in Baltimore and going insane."

I read this line in the village voice this morning. I wanted to share it with my friends.

Notice the lack of adjetives. That's good writing.

me and eric are having a party. it started last week and it's going on until next wednesday. so please come, and bring some refreshments.

I've got another blog where I just talk crap about beavers.

Thank God

Chubby- did you call me today?
(Matty you are "chubby" aren't you?)
I thought I saw a missed call from you.

yeah , I forgot my username. So that's where I've been.

any ass way. listen to new danger doom. he's with danger mouse and the characters form adult swim.

FUcking HIlarious

Winners of the "I Look Like My Dog" Contest

Pop Culture Jones is clearly busy with "The new girl". How long do they have to date before she joins our blog?

If she doesn't join, should we perform an intervention for Jonesy? Don't tell me she's too good for blogging.

http://www.jacksonpollock.org/

Oh god. Just the mention of her name makes me tired. The last time I saw her on MTV she had these collegen filled fake lips. Not cool.

What happens when you take acid and you are suicidally depressed?

I just sold my special sodomy camera on eBay to a NASCAR fan. (I just took your joke, and retold it, like The Dirtiest Joke in the World told in "The Aristocrats")

No problem Skinny. Just some thoughts i've had for a while now.
Anybody interested in drinks next Saturday evening? I'll be in Springfield for the weekend.

That is me.

Wow! I never knew I was a sociopath. Thanks Moni!

Well, Personally, I think it sounds a lot like skinny for nothing.
I could be wrong.

Who does this remind you of?

Profile of a Sociopath

LPS, I need to borrow some junk from you. Do you have an air mattress we can borrow for our camping trip Wednesday?

I heard that about Peter G. too Matt. At least the impressive junk part, I don't anything about a sex change though.

I do believe that if does have a good pile a junk and he was showing it off, then he probably won't want to part with it.

Should write him personally and ask him if he'll part with his junk.

Intersting that "junk in the trunk" (big butt) and "junk" are both sexual sort of innuendoes.

"Clinch"

Yo Pagan: http://www.kidkameleon.com/

This will make you forget about Radiohead for a whiles. Check it, at least five hours worth of free mixes. Word.

"I think I may need a bathroom break? Is this possible?" W. writing a note to Condi during UN Security Council Meeting.

Supposadly a photoshop prank, but still funny.

Frances

Sounds like Usher (r&b singer to all you baby boomers that don't like black music ...yeah I'm kidding) has been listening to too much Sean Hannity. He wasn't too keen on Kanye: "...we all need to come together -- musicians, actors, politicians -- and help the Gulf region."

Michael Jackson has been talking about recording a song for the Hurricane. Get this: he wants to sing "We are the world." What a moron. Apparantly everybody else thinks he's a moron too because nobody will sing it with him.

Kanye West on rap and immortal fame: "Death is the best thing that can ever happen to a rapper. Almost dying isn't bad either."

Packing Heat and the Misses are in New York for the week. If he brings back a "I heart New York" shirt for me I'm gonna push him down a flight of stairs. OK. that was harsh. I'll just say I like the shirt and then put it stash it next to my other "I heart new york" shirt in the closet.

Learn to Dance with Napoleon Dynamite

That guy will do anything for some attention.

You're Bosnia-Herzegovina!

You've just been through a big tragedy.  You weren't sure you were
going to make it at all.  Now that you have, there's a lot to pick back up in your life,
and not enough people are helping you.  You just wanted a little more freedom, a chance
to be away from those who thought poorly of you.  Now it's time to build up some
confidence, and it looks like you have a good chance at that.  But you'll need a lot of
therapy.
Take
the Country Quiz at the href="http://bluepyramid.org">Blue Pyramid

Anybody wanna go to mardi gras?

Listening to prefuse 73 right now. I've been hung up on the early nineties: listening to 1000 homo djs (Jorgenson and reznor - like you didn't know) pailhead (Jorgenson - ian mckaye: supposedly Jorgenson got straight edge Ian to take acid before they recorded) my life with the thrill kill kult, lords of acid, everything wax trax, the new moby is shit, don't even bother, he does a new order song and it's just embarrassing, check out 'tightest whitest" out of Peoria, I think he sux, but everybody's talking about him (probably because he's from Peoria) check out myspace page and look at all the hip hop coming out of Springfield, there's a cool hip hop group that is on my friends list. offwhyte is on myspace too, he's from Springfield and recording in chicago now, learned about him from the imposter lps. check out hold steady, that guys making some fun music, he's in love with meatloaf, spingsteen, and billy joal, but he sounds like wanyne kramer (from mc5), really punked out, all he does is sing about djs, drugs, and catholicism. plus: he makes fun of sniveling indie kids. that shits funny.

Who are the moron twins LPS? YOU couldn't possibly be referring to these two lovely ladies?

Overeater Underachiever Housebuilder. Yeah, whatever your name is at the moment. I've been on a DJ Shadow kick and I've moved on to RJD2. I've need more electronic/ hip-hop/idm fixes. Give me ideas. What are you listening to?

I contributed a 30 pack of Bush to the Hurrican Relief Fund. It's the least I could do.

Actually, I'm guessing less then 50 percent of it will go to Hurrican victims - which is only like a 12 pack.

Anyway, for those of you that didn't understand where the party is (Lea) you gotta paste the pdf file into your address bar to view the flyer and the paticulars.

Dick Cheney's on TV explaining where the hell he's been the past seven days. Apparantly the liberal press isn't falling for the underground bunker excuse.

Git him you biased liberal media! You're the last bastion of some hyperbolic metaphor that I can't pin down right now.

And you thought you were having a bad day...

Party Saturday! All Beavers Invited!! Check out the pdf file.

http://upload.uglatto.com/EVERYTHINGUSEFUL_handout.pdf

Michael Jackson is writing a song for the victims of the hurricane. That should work... make everything a little better. He was going to write a song for the victims of 9/11, but I guess he never got around to doing it. He should probably start writing songs for molested children.

¡ hola mis amigos!
i have been playing with my website. If you´d like to compruébelo hacia fuera (check it out) go to

http://www.geocities.com/monimoni3/portfolio

gracias por su ayuda (thank you for your support)
Don't forget to sign my guestbook.

Mónica

Anyone who sees and paints
a sky green and fields blue
ought to be sterilized.

Adolf Hitler

I don't get it. Is he speaking in metaphor? Is he just anti-artist. What if the person is color blind?

I understand the George Bush's job is hard. Predicting the leavee's were going to break was probably hard too. Dammit Science is hard to understand too. I just feel so overwhelmed with how hard everything is.

On our way through downtown last evening, we saw a care with Louisiana plates with this written on the rear window:

Forget Bagdad

Save New Orleans!

Let's home our nation building has improved now that we have had a little practice.

--Next week...Wildfires in the Northwest!

OK. just let me know when this Bush bashing gets old, but this is kind of funny and sad.

There's an anti-Bush advocacy group called the Coalition for a Realistic Foreign Policy.

So what does that make our current foreign policy?

Is there a Pro-Bush advocacy group called the Coalition for a Fantasy Foreign Policy?

Why is it everytime something really fucked up happens, GW sends his dad and Clinton to go and fix it?

Bush said nobody could have predicted this would happen. Either he took his hyperbole pills again or somebody in his administration did predict it would happen and he responded by cutting FEMA funding by forty percent.

Speaking of hyperbole pills, does anybody got some?

http://www.fema.gov/kids/hurr.htm

This is where all the funding left for FEMA went after Bush got done with it.

"'I'm not saying it wouldn't still be flooded, but I do feel that if it had been totally funded, there would be less flooding than you have,' said Michael Parker, a former Republican Mississippi congressman who headed the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers from October 2001 until March 2002, when he was ousted after publicly criticizing a Bush administration proposal to cut the corps' budget." - from the Chicago Tribune, noted by Josh Marshall"

I know we talked about this already Matt, but those people is Mississippi and Florida and what not can all go to hell.

It's the same shit every year. Every August the whole country needs to feel sorry for the southeast because of water damage to their homes. Every freaking year.

"It kind of makes your problems seem small in comparison," says lady about Hurricane Katrina.

No, it doesn't.

Kim has a paper due in two weeks on mulitcultural issues in counseling.

One of the questions in her book was "Does the culture of the person who is counseling you matter?" and "How would you be affected if the person counseling you was from a different culture?"

Please complete the following sentences:

If my counselor was caucasian, I would feel...
If my counselor was black, I would feel...
If my counselor was Navaho Indian, I would feel...
If my counselor was communist Chinese, I would feel...
If my counselor was a gay, black, communist Chinese, I would feel...

There is a joke in there somewhere.

http://www.tourettesguy.com/videos.htm

holy shit! I'm still laughing.

"all you do all day is sit around with your ass up your ass"

I'm just sick to death of people talking about gas. 30 cents more a gallon. so what. everybody's got a story to tell too, like there's an interesting gas story out there. I don't care how long you waited at the gas station I don't car if you spent 700 dollars filling up your tank. I don't even care if they raised the price while you were pumping your gas. and now everybody's acting like they're going to start riding their bikes. stupid

some asshole downloaded a live coldplay album on packing heat's cpu. wtf?

I once read somewhere that Shiavo's parents (or husband) should auction off the feeding tube on ebay.

Low and behold, check it out, there it is on ebay.

Beava Brotha The Wily Brotha She builds her dreams. She destroys tha lies. ... He is tha Wily Brotha. And he is here ta INTUBATE us all . I started yo shit and i'll end yo' shit. ... gizoogle bitches

The Wily Drug Deala
Cracka Powa, The Wily Brotha She builds her dreams so bow down to the bow wow. She destroys tha lies n shit. ... He is tha Wizzle Brotha fo' sheezy. And he is hizzy ta INTUBATE us all cuz Im tha Double O G. ...

LPS
we'll have to poll the rest of the beavers to see what they know a out Nancy Drew.
Personally... I don't know any nancy drew.
Maybe we should go with Amelia Bedelia?

ugh

Anybody else comes as Draco and I'll throw down a patronus on their ass. I'm serious.
MaKK T. is so harry potter, it's not even funny.

Okay... Josh has agreed to the HP wedding provided that Eric either comes as Hagrid or (better yet) Moaning Myrtle.
Everybody is free to pick your own costume. I do hope that Snape will be there and of course the party won't fly without Dobby!

As for the "Harry Potter" themed wedding.... i'm gonna have to think about it. Decorations could get pretty expensive. Can you imagine the cost of renting "the great hall" for our reception?

Now that is comedy Eric. That looks like the stray cat that always came inside my apartment before we moved.

If I was the prezz, and Cindy Sheehan was outside my ranch? I'd blare Black Sabbath's War Pigs 44 hours a day - full blast. boo... boo.. boo. ya ka. ha!

I saw some overeager duck feeders at the park the other day. They were gothic looking couple and they were just absolutely pelting these ducks with large chuncks of squished together bread.

The ducks were loving it though. The didn't mind how fast the bread was coming at them.

In other news:

95,638,231 women internationally have engaged in bestiality.
255,035,283 men internationally have engaged in bestiality.
In a train carrying 300 people - 5 women and 12 men are experienced.
At the Hollywood bowl, you will find 261 experienced women, and 695 men.
If your company has 100 people - 3 women and 8 men have had experience.

OK. That's bs. They're just using those stats to make them feel better. A little justification, what not.

Some of their other ads show pictures of "tom boy knees."

They're comparing these Nike ads to Dove ads, which also show women that considerably bigger then your average waifish model.

My butt is big
And round like the letter C
And ten thousand lunges
Have made it rounder
But not smaller
And that’s just fine.
It’s a space heater
For my side of the bed
It’s my ambassador
To those who walk behind me
It’s a border collie
That herds skinny women
Away from the best deals
At clothing sales.
My butt is big
And that’s just fine
And those who might scorn it
Are invited to kiss it.
Just do it.

I'd like to start out by saying this is the new Nike ad and it is genius as usual.

Also, did you know Adidas is a German shoemaker? I had no idea.

Anyway, let's get to the point. This is kind of old news but did anyone else get a little creeped out by the adidas and reebok merger? apparently adidas is going to climb on top of reebok's shoulders and start making more expensive top of the line shoes in an attempt to take down Nike! Meanwhile reebok's job will be to go after the light aerobics womens crowd, and also try to move in on the suburban fifty cent kids. (I guess adidas is going after the urban crowd while adidas is going suburban?)

It's kind of ambitious that adidas is trying to take on Nike, but I just don't see the "A" shoe keeping up with the progressive, high money, high profile Nike team. Adidas has always relied on a bit of the wax notalgia for their image. I just don't want Adidas to get ugly. Otherwise I'm going to have to start wearing Vans again.

Death to the Record - Death Death to the Record. Eric B. and Rakim were right. (They're rappers to you baby boomer bloggers)

"WARNER Music Group (WMG) is to begin releasing music by artists in “clusters” of three or four tracks rather than as whole albums, heralding the first big shift away from the record industry’s traditional business model."

The only people we can blame for this is everyone else. The whole world's been trying to kill "the record" for years. First by actually making something initially called "the record" obsolete. Something that happened when I was like six-years-old. Now they've begun fianl plans for the complete deconstruction of the record format itself.

back at ya hossman - Happy freaking monday. Somebody brought up that Josh and Monica should have a Harry Potter wedding. Was that you Eric? Anyway, I got dibbs on draco malfoy. Crabbe and Goyle? well I think Ebben could play both of those roles.

I found you Captain Stinkpot.

Coil


Which Wax Trax! Artist Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Get on myspace.com you river rats.

Way to go Alex! Aren't you going to give us any details?

ps. don't stick me at the nerd table.

For those of you who don't check your email and those of you that I don't have email for.... While on vacation this past week, I got engaged. Josh proposed on Tuesday and I of course accepted.
Hope everyone else is well.

I deeply apologize my blog behavior. I shall in my suspension reflect on what I have done and said.

Until such time as I am reinstated to admin status, please peruse this page that highlights in an important manner George W. Bush's Fondness for Bald Heads.

I've tempararily have taken Matt K. off administrative status from the Wily
Beaver. He can return to his post of authority when he gets over his intentions of killing this horrible blog.

This is not a mutiny. LPS is still holding administrative status as well, and it will be up to either of us when Matt K. will be allowed to return.

Let me just say that Chubby is lucky I didn't kick his little testes straight off this blog. Just because you can't post anything interesting doesn't mean you have to deprive the rest of us from posting our own incredibly stupid crap.

Check it: Great idea for a movie. Similar to Open Water, they should now make The Trunk. It would be about the kids that died after they locked themselves in that car trunk. That could be a pretty dark movie.

I think the best way to put down "packing heat" would be to fight fire with fire, and just bore him to death.

We're going to have to kill Packing Heat and the Blog? I'm down.

I love you all.

That is why I'm going to kill this blog.

"My mom said she learned how to swim. Someone took her out in the lake
and threw her off the boat. That's how she learned how to swim. I said,
'Mom, they weren't trying to teach you how to swim.' "
--Paula Poundstone

Paula, Paula, Paula...It's all abouta Paula Smalla.

Great quotes by comedians

Your mom pays for sex.

Sometimes I get confused. Is this that kind of blog?

Been surfing on Gay.com tonight - nice site. It's funny because when you read their articles this little gay voice in your head takes over. Here's an example from their review of the Scissor Sisters:

Scissor Sisters is fueled by each member's genuine enthusiasm, unpolluted by unnecessary irony or premature bitterness. Their sometimes-improvised costumes look pulled together from a couple big boxes of dress-up clothes: scarves, huge sunglasses, bandannas, berets, boas and stoles, silk shirts and purple velour jackets. They encourage their fans to dress up at shows. The more clothes, the more people, the more fun.

Don't tell me Big Gay Al wasn't in your head when you read that. Here's a pic of the Scissor Sisters.

My parents and Woo are out of town for the weekend, so that means I'll be house sitting all by myself. Who wants to come over and make out? Wrap your toungue around that.

Here's a photo of me for all you that don't what I look like. Now you see why the call me Skinny For Nothing!!! Eh?
All right good. I've done my blogging for the month. C you bitches next month. Dirt!

Ugliest band ever? Pop and I ran into the blond outside the Smart Bar, and he about creamed his pants. That's one of the reason he's not my best friend anymore.

This post-punk new-wave music trend is killing. I just wish snow would come back.

this summer is killing me. I can't wait for the cold weather to come back.

I'd neck you dry chubby.

Of course I've had it in the ear before.

A Girl's Guide to Geek Guys

Yeah! Now that skinny and me are friends again, I'll take him to Paris.

Paris at night

I have to apologize for my absence lately. I've been in an abusive best friend relationship with Pop Culture Jones, and am happy to relate that I will now be best friends with Chubby the Mindbender once again.

It's been a hard couple of months having to eat lunch with and run around the park with Pop Culture all the time. I'm just glad it's finally over. FINALLY OVER. I've been wanting to say those two word for almost forever.

Play Asteroids

Humorous photos