I like Zen Buddhism.

In Zen Buddhism you can say one thing definitively and mean the exact opposite at the same time, like "less is more."

What?

"Always keep a diamond in your mind." Wait, that was Tom Waits, but it is kind of Zen.

"I am overrun by tiny ants, crawling on my arms as I rest my wrists on the keyboard." That is for real, not Zen at all. I really do have ants crawling everywhere at my work.